(Translation from Russian)
Click here to see the Russian original text.
Nothing depresses us as much as loneliness.Why does it
visit us so frequently? Why doesn't it go away? Yes, loneliness has many faces,
and most of them seem to belong to women.
But do these faces always belong to the weaker sex? Let's see. Statistically,
Washington, D.C. has the second largest population of single men. Typical here
is the 40 year old man with no children. And such men increasingly begin to
turn their heads in the direction of foreign lands, trying to imagine our women
when thinking about a lifetime partner. Why? Are they loking for a housemaid,
or perhaps a more liberated housekeeper?
Not at all. They have something absolutely different on their minds. They think
that American women, unlike ours, are too spoiled. Moreover, they know that
our women, as opposed to the American female, cannot imagine a family without
children. They know that our women think less about a business career, and are
not ruled by the almighty dollar. Often in American families,a husband who loses
his job loses his wife at the same time. She has no patience to wait for better
times (especially when her opportunities for career advancement are greater
now than men's by federal law), and she immediately begins to seek a more reliable
economic partner. That is of course a new one who is working and hopefully (though
more and more infrequently) making more money than she. Such high stakes, such
calculating ruthlessness and competitiveness that now passes for an American
family, is all beyond our understanding.
Perhaps American men as well find it all too difficult to put up with. For two
years now, American marriage service Encounters International has been doing
booming business in the Washington suburb of Bethesda, Maryland. It helps people
in different countries find each other and make a family. The service has its
counterpart office in Moscow and recently opened a satellite office in Tallinn,
Estonia. The service is directed by Natasha Spivack,a Russian language professor,
who survived the death of a Russian husband and all the pain of loneliness involved
in putting together a new family, which she has accomplished. Now she helps
others get rid of loneliness.
We've talked about what American men want. Now let's look at the obscure object
of their desires: Estonian women. I should know something about that since I,
Galina Tsibulenko, am the director of the new Tallinn office. If an Estonian
women wants to change her life drastically, she now has such an opportunity
through Encounters International. First, she will need to fill out our biographical
profile, then attach a few recent photos. After that, she is interviewed for
the video camera in English - a must in order to be accepted. Within a week,
the profile package with video intervieware delivered to Washington. At the
same time, the Tallinn office receives pictures of the American men participating
in the project. After reviewing the photos, a women may chose a few men who
interest her and write letters to them introducing herself. Men can be attracted
just as much by the letter as by the glistening photos.
If it turns out a couple has common interests and views on life, they continue
corresponding. And who have the best chances for success? No age group in particular.
It has become clear that many women over 40 are not faced with a dead end in
their personal life. Women of different ages - from 18 to55 - participate in
the correspondence. The oldest American man in the program is 71. All the letters
are sent by fax are often exchanged twice a week. Finally, it becomes time to
meet, and the man journeys to Tallinn see his potential bride. He is prepared
for engagement and brings the rings along. Dropping on one knee, he proposes
... to the great surprise of our women. Who here would have thought that American
men could be such chevaliers?
The entire process can cost the man upwards of 2 thousand dollars. As for our
women,they are simply required to become members of the club and pay a one-time
processing fee. If both the men and woman decide they are a good match and marriage
is possible, the woman prepares to move to America. A groom takes upon himself
all the paperwork for the visa. In America the prospective husband and wife
legally have 3 months to get married. By that time, a prenuptial agreement is
composed and signed.
At the time of writing, our Tallinn office has been open for 2 months and 7
women have been corresponding with faraway America. Already in February, one
American is getting ready to come to Tallinn. Two more women are waiting for
a similar meeting in April. The communication between Estonia and America will
become far more extensive in the future. Increasingly, Estonian women are appearing
in the Encouters International office catalog in Bethesda. I urge Estonian women
of all ages to come into our office and apply. How can it hurt to try? Just
call our office, set an appointment, and take alook at our catalog where American
men's photos and profiles are displayed. Within the past 2 years, 42 couples
have found each between Moscow and Washington and gotten married. Maybe luck
will strike one of our women too. Like the one who got a telephone message,
"I want to see you soon!"